July

I have come to love the month of July. I have only now realized that July is the only month that I am not thinking about school. Its the month that I can devote all my time to Braden. I wish that I had more time during the school year to stop thinking about school. If I am not at school I am thinking about the seating chart, or how to teach science, or what should I do with my children that don't follow directions the first time. It is daunting to come home with hours of correcting, or projects to work on. Today I spent a few hours at the library looking for books to teach cause/effect and compare/contrast. It never ends and my mind is full, crowed and complete chaos. 


Since I have a job that I never truly ever leave at work, I guess I am going to have to learn to make due with the time I do have to myself. It is time I want to spend with Braden. Laughing together, telling stories, sharing new and exciting things. I just like spending time with him. He is so kind, caring and patient. I know that our time we together each week isn't very much but we can make the most of our time together. When we are apart I think about him and wish that I was with him. I wish that we could be going on a drive together, or walking through the cemetery.  


How I long for July. I wish that July was here tomorrow. I wish that my mind could be clear and calm and I could devote every moment to Braden. I guess we make do and think more about quality rather that quantity. I just hope that Braden knows that we may not have a lot of time together right now in life, but we have eternity to be together.  Eternity that is just like July. Clear and calm and focused on the family that we love the most. My eternity will be spent with Braden. Clear and calm and focused entirely on him because I love him.